So yesterday was my anniversary on WordPress, and ever since then I have been wondering what I should make this post about.
I have been meaning to write a new post for a week now but I had so much of an abundance of reference able material that the opposite of productivity happened: Stagnation…which in turn lead to feeling like a total failure. That happens to me a lot, where I am so overwhelmed with ideas that I actually wind up demotivated, fearing I will never be able to do my ideas justice. This inevitably leads to the final defeatist statement my little inner voice shuts me down with, “whats the point then?”… But I am doing this now.
For everyone curious as to what these topics/articles of interest that became the bane of my creative existence, then what follows is a list of links to these:
1) Happiness and it Disconnects
2) 25 professions and what its like to date someone in them
3) 13 ways to identify someone who has their shit together
4) 30 things to stop doing to yourself
http://www.lifebuzz.com/just-stop/#!FwPgZ
5) 5 regrets of the dying
http://www.lifebuzz.com/5-regrets/#!FwPhh
6) Ten life lessons to excel in your thirties
http://markmanson.net/10-life-lessons-excel-30s
As you can tell, dear reader, most if not all the posts are from other blogs. Other, more established, better managed blogs. Let it not be said that I am not interested in blogging but sometimes it can be a daunting experience, as I am sure many of you will agree, specially when you are subscribed to and regularly read some fantastic blogs yourself. How does one even begin to compare???
So I am going to just start adding random post about…stuff… here.
For instance, in reference to the title of this post, let me fill you in. I have suffered the worst combination of allergy-sinus blowout, asthma by proxy, hormonal tornado (Hot flashes and all) and splitting headaches only in the right section of my cranium.
This image should eloquently and quite clearly present my state of mind these past few months. Needless to say I am exhausted. It is hard work being a full time student, while your body just basically insists on hating you and being uncooperative, and all the while there are raging bush fires right down the damn road. Add to that a strange lack of rain in tropically wet Borneo, and you have a very cranky Ramsha Penguin.
BUT
Looking on the bright side now. My boyfriend and I celebrated our one year anniversary earlier this month. It was probably one of the simplest yet sweetest nights I can ever remember. He went out of his way to make it as special as it possibly could get (on a budget, because we are both kinda broke this month haha) and I will remember it forever. I am grateful to have him and all the things he does and I hop for so many more years of having him. He is surely one of my blessings.
I also had some great times with new friends and old. I got closer to my two girl friends than ever before and met some really great new people too. They both feature on a short documentary I am filming currently for class, which I will hopefully be able to share. Its always great to know you can attract great people into your life that feel that you are worth getting to know, worth KEEPING, regardless of how messed up or damaged you might be.
That is, by the way, one of my all time favorite dialogues of any film ever (Casper, 1995, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casper_(film), Devon Sawa).
Yes it is nice to be wanted and kept around, but nicer to be accepted and welcomed.
Another fun thing to happen was that last week I visited KL with one of my new friends. Four nights of broke adventuring, chasing after bakeries and hunting down an Indian barbar shop so that my very white, very Australian companion could get a shave. I ate some good food, drank some Strongbow and met some old friends. All in all, it was hectic and frenzied and super fun… I will not go into the bad bits here because this is the BRIGHT SIDE SECTION (but trust me, there were some).
Here are photos of said fantastic bakery, Tous Le Jours (check it out here: http://tlj.com.my)
How absolutely beautiful is that? Its like a buffet which also serves delicious coffee and teas in HUGE mugs. All of which equals massive doses of happiness. Kuala Lumpur always leaves me feeling exhausted and refreshed simultaneously. So here is hoping I can land a job there once I graduate, because the city is just exhilarating and liberating and I love every brightly lit street and dodgy dark alley. Or maybe that is just rose colored holiday glasses talking? Either way, KL was great.
So in conclusion to this super long, ranty post, Id like to say that I will be posting more because I have stopped caring to achieve a certain standard, and just try to make my own standard. I’ve been unwell and blessed all at the same time, and I am finding myself spoilt for choice when it comes to inspiration materials. So heres hoping for greater productivity all around!
I represented Pakistan this morning, in a University event
The Penguin and The Machine 